the funny thing about it.

I miss ABA.

I know. I know. Katt, are you nuts?!

Probably.

Okay, I don't totally miss ABA. I miss the camaraderie that ABA had brought us. My "ABAers" would meet every Monday night. We would have our weekly agenda and all the gab that comes with a group of 8 people coming together, week after week, to discuss one common goal: recover Maddy.

We would gather around my house, or Melissa's house, or the church and talk about our lives, talk about Maddy, and just talk. We had some interesting conversations. And our meetings, regardless of how "short" I promised each one would be, they always ended up being at least 2 hours...if not more.

You see, I love these people.

I love everything about them. I love how they gave up a part of their lives to help me get a huge part of mine back. They would come, week after week, and listen to me drone on about ABA. They put up with Maddy screaming and throwing tantrums at them. They did countless hours in a tiny room with that little girl. They put their heart and soul into teaching my little girl how to make the connections in her brain again. And they all did it...willingly. They cherished their time. They looked forward to their time. They loved on my little girl just as much as her own Mommy and Daddy did.

And now, our meetings are sparse. Maddy still has her sessions and they are peer play themed. Not much instruction is needed at this point. Teach Maddy to keep playing and to play appropriately with other people.

I'm not complaining about my miracle. I'm not.

I couldn't imagine my life without these people. I can't imagine my life any other way.

I just miss them. I miss our Mondays. I miss the closeness of us. I entrusted them with one of THE most precious things in the world. My baby.

Do I miss data sheets? NO. NEVER.

Do I miss having to keep up the insane pace of my genius daughter? Not really.

Do I miss the feeling that I have no idea what I'm doing? I don't know if that will ever truly leave me...but I've got peace that Maddy's ultimate life experience isn't up to me.

And it's not like I don't see my people. They are my best friends. I see them almost every day. I'm just such an emotional person. When I become as close as I have come with these people, I miss them about ten minutes after I said good bye to them. I'm such an emotional person, I was just distraught for days when my favorite television shows ended because I would MISS the characters. Silly. I know. But truth. When I form a connection, it is deep. And this connection is very deep.

I am forever grateful and thankful for my sisters. That's what they are to me. My ABA sisters. (Justin shouldn't be offended since he was the only boy...being that he's my husband and it would be weird to refer to him as my ABA brother)

I am happy to close the ABA chapter. I am. I just don't know any adequate way of thanking someone for helping me bring my daughter back. A simple thank you does not cut it. "Thanks again for that..." sounds ridiculous. Like they picked up Maddy from school and brought her home.

I know that just seeing her be the miracle she is...is probably more than enough for them. But I love them. And I hope they know that. I hope they know that they will forever be a very important part of my life. No matter where that life leads any of us.

Love you guys. I still think we need to get that bumper sticker that says "HONK if you love ABA"  :)